Josué and warm weather

So this past week I have had numerous problems with Josué, my 10 year old who refuses to do anything. He will not do his work in school, (and he is failing just about everything), he will not do his in chores in the dorms, his does not do his homework, the list just goes on and on. It started on Monday and it just has not stopped he has been kicked out of estudios twice this week. And he is just not doing anything. I am at my wits end with him. His attitude is worse now than it was at the beginning of the year. His mother does not care about him, and his father is not really in the picture. But Josué is just not learning from his mistakes, the consequences he receives do not work. It is as if he has just given up. This past week I have been restless at night thinking about him, and what I can do to help him, but nothing works. I have gone to Hno. Julian many times and he knows that nothing is working for Josué. Josúe is very smart and is capable of doing all the work in school he just is lazy and it does not help that he does not want to live here anymore because he is given responsibilities that he does not have at home. I am just lost as to what to do with him.

But I went to mass today and it was nice, I felt a sense of calmness during Eucharist. And I know that everything will work out with Josué hopefully. God has not given me any challenge that has been to difficult. But Josué is a constant challenge right now in my life. And I often feel like I am failing at my job because Josué is my responsibility, but after many many talks with him, he is just not willing to do the work or any of his responsibilities here in Casa Hogar. Hopefully next week we can start over with him and I will figure out another system that works for him, because our color system which is working for everyone is not working for him.

On another great note the weather here has been relatively nice we have not seen snow or ice in almost two weeks. I can go outside in jeans, a shirt, and a fleece. So I am happy, because being a Southern Girl I do not like this cold weather. My blood is too thin for this cold weather. But I was told that the weather changes back and forth all through Feb. so wish me luck, that I can endure this terrible weather. Thank you God for the SUN and WARMTH we have had all week hopefully there will more in the weeks to come. And next week is festejos where we celebrate all the birthdays of each month, and it is my favorite day. So far we have had movies, we went to a park, we had a carnival, and so much more. I love it because the boys get to be boys and play all afternoon. And they are always on their best behavior. So I will let ya´ll know how that goes. Peace and God Bless!!

What a GREAT Thursday

So my goal is to write once a week, and I am surprised I found the time to write again. But today was such a great day for me and my kids. First my kids were just so wonderful, well it is Thursday so we have our ups and downs, but today I don´t know what it is but I just starting figuring some things out in my life, and I know that I made the right decision to come here. So we started the year with a new system for our kids for their conduct, and so far it is working. We have three stickers: green- great, yellow- ok, and red-bad. Well the kids are really taking to it, so that is nice. Every morning the kids have been checking to see what they received, and it is just so cute. So I feel that at least I am doing something right. So all my kids went to school, and I went to Walmart with all the volunteers it was fun, but we were there for two hours, and I was ready to get home. So I get home and a hour later our kids came back, well two had with reports for fighting, but after they all went to eat we had very little problems. It was a very easy afternoon.

So then I went to to religion class, and I had to switch from the big kids who I love to the youngest bunch, and I was a little apprehensive about it. But I walked into the room and the boys just lite up with smiles when they saw me. They were so excited to see me, and so I got really excited for the class. The mom who teaches it is great with the kids and the kids were perfect. We played a matching game, and they wanted me right in there with them. I really just felt at home in the classroom. So all day my one child, Alejandro who is my favorite even though we are not supposed to have them, he was the one who gave me the most trouble when we arrived, but he is a little angel now. And we just joke and laugh and he hugs me all the time. I am just so filled with love it is hard to explain. So last night Alejandro told me he loved me, and here in Mexico there are two ways to say I love you, "Te quiero, and te amo" well my little Alejandro was all te amo, and he just told me how he felt about me. And I now know how it is to feel the love of having a child. These are my children and I treat them as if they were my own. And everyday I grow closer and closer to them and this experience becomes more and more real to me. I cannot wait to see what God has in store for me in the months to come. And I am anxiously waiting to see what is to come in my life as well. As all of my friends get married, and I am here in Mexico sometimes I question if this was the right move, but then I see my kids smiling at me and telling me how much I mean to them. And then I snap back to my reality of my kids, and this is my life. I have never been one to follow I have always done my own thing, and so going to college, getting married and having kids is what many people think is the perfect plan, but I am just going to go with the one God has for me, and if I am supposed to do more missions in the years or months to come, I will be ready for it.

I´m back

It has been way too long since my last post. But December in Casa Hogar was crazy we had about 11 parties for the boys, where they recieved many presents, candies, and tamales. It was fun, but I was ready for a vacation. I had a wonderful time with my friends and family and I was able to relax alot. But by the last couple of days I was ready to come back to Casa Hogar, I missed my kids. And so I made my journey back, and yes it was a journey I left for the airport at 1:30 to find out my flight was running late, and so I missed my flight to Mexico, spent the night in a hotel in Texas, went to the airport at 12 waited 5 hours to hear that my flight was canceled, so I flew to Monterrey, waited an hour for a ride, and finally made it back to Saltillo at 12. Without my luggage which was God knows where for 2 days. But it was all worth it. I missed my family of volunteers and the Brothers. And when I heard my first child yell my name, I was oh so happy. I had waited two weeks for my kids to yell, "Katy" and it was pure joy. So the kids came back last Wednesday night, and by Friday we heard a tap on the window, and school was cancelled, due to snow. I never thought I would see snow here, but I did, and it snowed all day. So we watched many movies and just tried to stay as warm as possible. But it was a pretty sight to see, but I could not get and stay warm. I was wearing two jackets, tights, jeans, sweaters hats, gloves. You name it I was wearing it. Then the kids all went home and I had a nice relaxing weekend with my friends sleeping and trying to stay warm. Sometimes it is colder inside than out thanks to every house being made solely of concrete. My goal is to write more on my blog, and since I will not be running because it is just too dang cold you will be getting more and more info about the fabulous life of Casa Hogar.

Memorable Day

So yesterday was my birthday, and I am not a big fan. I do not like the fact that I am now 24 one year closer to a quarter of a century. And for 2 years in a row my parents forgot that my birthday existed. So anyway, yesterday was great I stayed in bed till 11, had a delicious meal with the community. And then my boys came back to me. In the night we had a little fiesta in their dorm. And the kids all sang to me in English and it was so beautiful, I almost started crying. And all day long I was being told, "feliz cumple" it was just so comforting. And then I checked my facebook and I had like 50 "happy birthdays" and that is so nice and I received some great emails from the family. Although it is just a post on facebook, it really means a lot, because sometimes I feel so disconnected from the entire world here. And it is not that I am in some hut in Mexico it is just I am surrounded by kids all the time and they are my top priority now in my life.
I try to keep up with the news, but time is limited here and I would rather be reading in my room than reading about universal heathcare. And since none of what is going on in the U.S. is really affecting me I have just been really disconnected. But it has actually been really nice. I have no money, no car, and no worries here. My only responsibility is my 10 boys. And they are all being on their best behavior because we have posadas which are Christmas Fiestas. So starting tomorrow the kids have a different posada each night for the 2 weeks. It should be really fun. So me preparing for Christmas this year is making sure my boys don´t eat too much junk food and sugar and actually going to bed. I am looking more and more forward to it. And although I am going home for two weeks, I am going to deeply miss my kids. I see them 6 days a week and they are my everything right now. I worry that some will not return after Christmas, like Luis and this is week 3 without him here. And we have no way of getting in touch with him, because the phone numbers are all turned off. So I have given him to God and I pray that he is being taken care of. And I hope he returns after the Holidays.
So this week started off beautifully with my birthday party in the dorms and 4 posadas to look forward to.

Spirtual High Part 2

So if you have been following you will know that I am on a Spiritual High. And each and every day just get better and better. I have never been this happy and full of life. And my boys for the most part are being awesome. There are posadas coming up which are just a bunch of Christmas parties for the kids. And the boys must be on their best behavior if they want to attend. So they have been great and even going the extra mile to help in the dorm. It has been really nice.

They are waiting for Christmas just as we all are, but this year is different for me. I do not have the stress of buying presents because I am poor, and my family gets to see me for Christmas, (which I think is a great present hahaha). All I have for Christmas is my 10 beautiful boys, and I could not ask for anything else. They truly are the best present and this experience as well is the be present in my life. And they have taught me more about myself in 4 months that I have learned in 24 years. I have more patience with them than any other person I have encountered. And that is one of my flaws my short patience. But with them it is totally different. I feel like I have the patience of JOB. Now not all the time because sometimes I find myself praying for patience when they are in line and Martín and Daniel are constantly playing. But they wait for me and my Spanish to come out, and I know that they know how much I love them. God is truly working miracles in my life more and more every day. And my kids just put a smile on my face all the time. Especially the other night when we were in prayer in the dorm and Elizabeth takes one dorm and I have the other, and I have had the little kids lately, and Josué was singing "Navidad Navidad, Navi, Navi-dad es un dia de alegría y felicidad" oh and it is their version of Jingle Bells so try and imagine. So then I got all excited and wanted to learn and the next thing I know we are all huddled around singing "Navidad, Navidad" it was so cute. Those little moments here in Casa Hogar are what makes the biggest impact to me.

Spirtual High

So can I just say I have been on a Spirtual High since my last bad Monday. It seems that everything happen for a reason. And I have figured out a lot of things in the month of November. I finally got the reason why God wanted me to be here. And so much more. My relationship with God has definently changed this past month. At one point I was down because I was searching and I was not getting answers, but this past week and the week before it is like everything is just all working out. I have learned I can take care of the kids all by myself, and it has been really rewarding to have 12 kids calling my name all the time needing shampoo, gel, toothpaste, etc. I ahve gotten closer to the kids in this past week then I have the past 4 months I have been here with them. God does not give us more than we can handle. I have a great person working by side, I have 10 beautiful boys (we lost 2 last week :( I`ll get to that) I have an amazing relationship with God, and I have made some really amazing friends here who are like my family. I really have no complaints, minus the food. Oh and I did prayer all by myself in the Chapel with all the volunteers and it was as if God has speaking through me. For the first time I was able to explain my story to the volunteers and why I am here. My Spanish was perfect the prayer was perfect, the whole moment was perfect.

Then two days later it was Thanksgiving, well we do not have it here obviously, and I was a little down. But in the night Elizabeth and I explained Thanksgiving to the kids, and my little Alejandro wanted to give thanks for ME. It is a Thanksgiving moment I will never forget, and it brought tears to my eyes. Thank you God for the little moments like that.

Life is such a learning experience

So each day I am learning more and more about myself. And my kids are learning more and more how to work with me and me with them. Although I have had my problems with the kids this month has been somewhat easy. Alejandro and Josuè are getting along beautifully. And Alejandro is learning how to control his anger more and more. Instead of running out or Casa Hogar ans down the street or banging on the door of his closet or the dorm he is taking the time to quiet himself down and think instead of just exploding. Last week he was just having a bad day not that he was doing anything wrong, everything was just going wrong for him. So I held him in his bed for 10 minutes and he just cried in my arms. It was a great bonding moment for he and me. I am looking foward to many more this year with him. As for Josuè I have figured out that him recieving a tiny cookie does the trick for getting him to get the job done. He is even doing better in estudios. And he is learning how Casa Hogar works, (it only took 3 months) he figured out that there are consequences for everything good and bad. So this week has been a huge learning experience for the kids.



On a sad note, this Monday was probably the hardest day for me here in Casa Hogar. One of my children in Chicos B has been the victim of abuse from his step-father. And for the first time since I have been here in 5 months I had to face that reality. I knew these children have been abused in the past, but I ahd to deal with it with the Psychologist, Hno. Julian, and the mother. It was a very emotional day for me. All day I cried for my child. And the system here in Mexico is very different. Which is another thing I have been having to accept the differences between the U.S. and here. But I have had so much support from Hno. Julian and the volunteers. Although my Spanish is not that great the other volunteers knew something was wrong, and they were all very understanding. Not only did I get words of wisdom, but also I received hugs all day. It was just very difficult to know that one of my kids is deeply sad at home and does not even want to go home on the weekends. But we are all working directly with the family and hopefully there will be a good outcome. And then to top it all off Luis Gerardo has not come back from home this week and we cannot get in touch with his family. He had minor problems last week and Elizabeth and I have yet to meet his parents each week either his brother or sister come to pick him up. Or he goes home with another child in Chicos B. And when Elizabeth and I told his brother we cannot recieve him without talking to his mother he never came back. And I highly doubt he will be back tomorrow since the boys go home on Friday.

This week has been challenging because I have had to deal with thier problems outside of Casa Hogar. That is the hardest part we are so sheltered and protected here the kids and the volunteers we do not have to face outside problems. I have very little problems in my life here, but I find myself stressed when I talk to people form the States or I have to deal with the kids and their homelife. These boys are just so fun loving and full of life. Many have been delt a really hard and rough life, but at least here they have an opprotunity at life and they all deserve the dignity that Casa Hogar gives them. Since I have been alone in Chicos B with the boys, but I have had help from Majo and Gorretti, but it is just not the same. They have been wonderful offereing themselves to help out in Chicos B, but the boys now rely on me for everything. If they need anything it is Kat-er-in this and Kat-er-in that. Yes that is how they say my name and I love it so much. I have grown closer and closer to them this week it is really amazing. When one is sad I am sad, when they are worried because they got a report in school and have to face Hno. Julian I worry with them. When they are all smiles I am too. It has been a great experience working so closely with them, and them coming to me when they have problems.

On a totally different subject we have partners for prayer and we all take turns with payer throughout the months. So every 5 weeks we are in charge of a week. So last time I had it with Nestor and he went out of town, so I had it all by myself, which was really difficult. And then this week Elizabeth and I have prayer, well she is recovering from surgery. But she did find me prayers to use, but I have had to present them. Thank God for the other volunteers because they have all really pulled through and helped me with prayer. But today I had a prayer and reflection picked out and ready to print. Well there was not ink in the printer. So I had to find something else. So I went to the bible, and found an amazing verse. And Chio read it for me, but for the first time I opened up to the other volunteers and I was able to use my awsesome Spanish, and for the first time I actually felt like I was part of this group. I told part of my story about how I came to be in Casa Hogar, and my Spanish was not so bad. Again I am learning more and more about myself and I have been forced to do it on my own, without help. All I really need is the help from God (and he is always there) and I can get through anything.